Give your lonely evenings a purpose with this tisane
It has been more than 18 months since I published my last blog post and many things happened in between. Surviving the pandemic was no joke and being stuck in a city where I knew nobody did not help either. How does a young woman without a life fill her lonely evenings with some purpose? She makes the “tisane for lonely women”, of course! (Tisana delle senzacazzo, for the Italian readers).
The recipe was given to me by my beautician Sandra, owner of the salon next to my apartment. Once the lockdown was lifted in June last year and shops opened up, I booked some massages to relieve the tension accumulated in my muscles over weeks of remote working. Sandra told me that what I actually needed was to drain liquids (and probably melt some fat) out of my legs. And that she had the recipe of a super powerful tisane with which she got rid of her baby fat within only one month after her child’s birth. “It takes some time to prepare, but anyway what else do you have to do in the evening?”, she pointed out.
Photo by Joanna Kosinska
Ah, us women! Always standing for each other and upholding one another with the cruel brutality of truth. I prepared the “tisane of lonely women” every single night for the entire last summer and carried it with me at work to sip during the day. Now, I am not sure whether it was the tisane or the fact that I walked back and forth from work for a total of 15 km per day that drained my legs last summer. To be totally honest, I am not even sure my legs drained at all. However, I am a big proponent of providing women with yet one more task to tick off during their days and of feeding them with more self-doubt about their appearance than what society already does… Soooo for all you lonely women out there, I am happy to share the recipe of Sandra’s tisane!
Step 1: Wash and cut in slices a lemon, making sure to remove the seeds and to keep the skin. Peel about 4 cm of ginger and slice it as well.
Step 2: Put the sliced lemon and ginger in a pot together with 1.5 of water and bring to boil.
Step 3: Turn off the heat and let the lemon and the ginger soak for one hour.
Step 4: Blend the mixture and filter out the remaining particles of lemon and ginger with a sieve.
Step 5: Let the tisane cool down in a stainless steel bottle and then put it in the fridge overnight.
Photo by Joan Tran
Step 6: The next morning, carry out this bulky and heavy bottle wherever you go. Sip it regularly and, while doing so, feel how your throat is burning due to the high concentration of ginger in the tisane. Trust that the same thing is happening with the fat around your hips.
Step 7: Book more massages to relieve your shoulders’ muscles from the tension of carrying around 5 kg of tisane for the entire summer!
Now I want to hear from you. Do you also believe that “more is more” and that you absolutely need to add one more task to your already busy ToDo list? How do you relieve your shoulders from muscle tension and your legs from unnecessary liquids? Let me know in the comments below and if you want to receive more recipes for disaster that actually work, don’t forget to subscribe to the Breaking Thirty Newsletter.